Second Sleep Surprises

It's 3:25 am as I write this.  I just woke up.  No alarm, no weird noises, nothing like that.  I am fully awake.  Some would call this insomnia, but Breadman recently told me about something called "Second Sleep."  Oh yes.  This bit about getting up at 3am and doing things like baking brownies or reading or jamming out to Pandora?  Our ancestors did this!  Well, maybe not to the extreme that I am taking it, but they did!  Really!  And they never called it insomnia!

Roger Ekirich, a professor at Virginia Tech, discovered that those in the past had two sleep sections at night.  This great online article, Your Ancestors Didn't Sleep Like You, details the second sleep, or segmented sleep, very well.  In between the two sleeps people would do things like read, pray, talk to one another, even go visiting!  And oh yes, let's not forget sex.  Prime time for loving.

So my time in-between second sleep?  I'm currently listening to Florence and the Machine's "Kiss With A Fist.  I'm on cup of coffee number two.  Second sleep pretty much rocks.

I woke up to three fifteen year olds who believe in a late first sleep, much to my chagrin.  Sleep over night, and I found pizza roll remains in the kitchen (what is in those?!), wrappers strewn among the living room, and an empty Arnold Palmer jug in the dining room.  They are now in bed, obviously, because having a mom around kills the fun.  Either that, or they've run out of movies or rap songs.

I used to think this time in-between sleeps was insomnia for me, but feel so much better thinking of it as two sleeps.  I enjoy having this little time in the night, where I can write and listen to some music.  But I know for me this is a luxury, as I'm on vacation this week and can sleep in after my time up until 8am.  During the week my second sleep periods are hard to manage, as I get up at 4am.  So, usually my second sleep doesn't happen; I fight it.  I try to go back to sleep.  I miss it.

It's hard not to eat breakfast now, though.  I'm craving toast with butter and jam.  But I can't have two breakfasts, or I'll end up looking like Jabba the Hut.  So I'll have cup of coffee number 3.

It's too bad that second sleep had to be faded out of our history.  But we live in such a rushed culture, and can't go to bed at 7pm anymore.  Ha!  Can you imagine, going to bed at 7pm every night in the winter? Um, yes I certainly can!  That would be heaven!  I'm such an early bird, that I would love to go to bed at that hour.  It would be so relaxing.  Then have the little time between first and second sleep, ah, sleep!  Maybe that's why Americans are so darn stressed out.  We don't have second sleep!  If we did, maybe we'd be better off.  I'm happier on days that I have my second sleep.  Yes, I know, because I sleep until eight or nine o'clock.  But still, there's something to be said for having that quiet time at night where you can contemplate, write, or do whatever (i.e. have sex).  The quiet of the evening does have a peacefulness that can't be duplicated during the day.

I could do the dishes.  I could clean up the mess from the teens.  But instead I will write for just a little bit more before retiring to bed.  Goodnight, all!

The Truth is Here...Somewhere

I'm obsessed with the X-Files.  When I heard that there was a new set of shows coming out, I was elated.  AND that the original cast was back?  No way!  What could be better?  

Launch 2016 back to 1993 when the show premiered.  I've been a fan since the beginning.  I'll admit I was skeptic at first, as I'm not really into science fiction.  The Ex convinced me it was worth watching, and an addiction began.  So many great memories, so many great shows.

But something is going on.  Since I heard about the new show I felt like I've been thrown back in time, and my mood has shifted.  I've been on this kick of listening to Courtney Love, Nirvana, and Garbage - all bands that I rocked out to during the X-Files reign.  I painted my nails blue.  I got highlights in my hair.  I cut my hair in a style that was different from the preppy bob I've worn for years.  What is going on?

Back in 1993 my days were filled with worrying about obtaining my teaching license, coaching cheerleading, and a young marriage.  My life is completely different now.  I feel that at that time I had ultimate hope - like the future was open and anything could happen.

Now my days are filled with worrying about renewing my teaching license (does that ever end?!), paying for college, and getting Kidlet A & B a good, used Volvo.  

The move has gone from worrying about me to worrying about them.  The truth is out there - it's now in my kidlets.

I'll admit I'm pretty damn scared that the Kidlets are leaving for college in two years.  Benefits?  Not having to do laundry every day.  Not driving all over to multiple music lessons, snowboarding jobs, and general activities.  But I will miss them so much.  As a single mom they have become even moreso my world these past seven years.  They will make great boyfriends, as who else has been dragged into Sephora before?  And forced to have a discussion about which shoes look best?  

I guess my identity crisis is starting early, as I prep for their departure in two years.  Who will I become once they're gone?  I can't go back to being that thirty-one year old I was when they were born.  My interests have changed.  I can still jam out to Hole and the best of Deadmau5, but the lyrics have changed in my head.  Will I be like Mulder?  Looking for the unknown, seeing something that's not there and hoping to find an answer from beyond?  Or will I be like Scully?  Grounded in the known, feet firmly on the ground, yet sometimes being reluctant to accept the unseen.  Perhaps I'll end up a combination of both.

So I'll continue to set that Pandora station to Courtney Love radio, and cover the kitchen in flour as I bake breads and cookies.  Some things may change, yet others stay the same.  It's said the truth will set you free.  We'll see.  Hopefully the truth will be fun.  

Flying Solo

I've become obsessed with making fresh bread so that I always have a loaf in the house.  I love the smell of it baking, and absolutely adore my one piece in the morning with butter.  I just made a loaf of raisin bread (shown above), so my home smells delicious.  And I am alone.

And you know what?  I enjoy it.

When I first got divorced there was that fear of being alone, without my sons.  How would I fill my time if my kids weren't here?  Seven years later, I am content in so many ways with the hours that I have when I fly solo.

Baking bread seems to be a very solitary activity.  It's not like cookies, where you can ask a child to help you decorate, throw in the sugar and chocolate chips.  This morning I was given a lesson from Breadman in using sourdough starter, but it's up to me to make that final loaf.  Right now I have the dough rising.  I will have so much bread!  Yippie!  My afternoon was spent with Pandora loudly playing, Courtney Love and Nirvana in the background.  My coffee cup was never empty.  My hands were covered in flour.  My kitchen sink is filled with dishes.  But I am so happy.  Oh yes.

(sourdough starter.  Doesn't it look yummy?  hehehehehe)

In the midst of the baking and rising of bread.  I did some Postcrossing.  For those of you not familiar with my addiction, it's the sending and receiving of postcards through Postcrossing.com.  I'm very active in the forum, trading pinup girls, fairies, foxes, and Alice In Wonderland cards.  I make envelopes for those who wish to have their cards protected in the mail.  I cover the cards and envelopes in washi tape, one of my other addictions.

(Only five you say?  Ha!  I have a huge box full!!!)

I texted with friends.  I drank more coffee.  But above all I enjoyed my ME time.

Of course I enjoy being with other people.  I cherish my time with friends and family.  But my time spent alone recharges me for the moments that I spend with them.  I enrich myself when I'm doing the individual things that I really can't do with them.  Want to send out postcards together?  Wouldn't really work.  Hey - want to mess around with washi tape?  That sounds kinky.  Eeek!  Washi tape kinky?  I don't think I want to go to that planet.  My point is that I'm a better person when I get to dance around the kitchen, pretending I'm a grunge singer, immersing my hands in wet dough, and slamming down my tenth (!) cup of coffee.  Would I do that with someone else present?  Of course I would.  But it's downright fun to do it on my own.

My sourdough loaf is in need of shaping.  Kidlet A & B return in an hour.  Life will get back to laundry folding, scheduling appointments, and the making of dinners for three.  Time to get ready to teach some teens some grunge.

Bean Countess

It's no secret that I'm a coffee addict.  I might as well have JAVAGAL on my license plate.  For one week I went down to five cups of coffee a day from my usual twelve.  Today was the day that I gave in and went back to the bean.  I have it all the time.  Some people drink water.  I drink coffee.

Let's put it this way.  I have little vices.  I don't drink.  While some people may relax with a glass of wine at night after a long day, I turn to a cup o' joe.  Aha!  I know what you're saying!  I'm an addict!  And yes, I probably am.  But I figure there are worse things I could be doing.

The other day I was walking through the hall and a co-worker remarked, "I don't recognize you without your coffee mug."  I guess it's become part of my personality.  I didn't like coffee growing up.  I have memories of my mother making her first cup in the morning, and my stomach turning from the smell.  I could hardly keep breakfast down.

Who gave me my first cup of coffee?  It was actually my ex-husband, during my first all-nighter in college.  Staying up late to complete a bio lab, or rather procrastinate and goof around while pretending to do said bio lab, my ex-husband introduced me to coffee.  History was made.

It wasn't until Kidlet A and B were born that the addiction came on full force.  The boys didn't sleep through the night, and never napped at the same time.  Pots of java were poured as I struggled to keep awake, sometimes days at a time.  My lack of sleep was awful.  I remember walking into a door jam one day in my stupor from days of unrest.  To the coffee I relied, helping keep me awake, warm, and reliable.

The time came where I wanted to get out of the house, as the life of a stay at home mom was making me feel so solitary.  Of course, I applied to Starbucks and became a barista.  It was one of the best jobs I've ever had, and enjoyed thoroughly.  Yes, I was wired on lattes and cappuccinos constantly to the point where I think I saw double.  But I got to interact with so many different people on a daily basis.  Aside from the man who ran his fingers through my hair at the register (eek!) and the woman who screamed so much over her venti iced latte having too much ice we thought we'd have to call the police, I had a good time.

Now my Starbucks days involve bringing my dad, who has the beginnings of dementia, for a coffee and sitting for awhile.  I tell him about my day - full of the shenanigans of my students, what's new with the kidlets, and my hopes for the future.  Yes, I still have hopes and dreams.  I tell my dad all, knowing that he may forget what I say within minutes of us leaving Starbucks.  But for those few minutes, I have his undivided attention and love over shared coffees.  He has a grande Pike Place with room.  Me?  Usually a grande skinny caramel macchiato.

It's not the caffeine that gives me the rush.  It's the promise of the future.  As the warmth of the beverage fills me, I am motivated once more to move on.  Addicted?  Maybe.  But I'm hooked on the excitement of today and tomorrow.  That sip reminds me it will all be ok.  Move forward!

Pinterest Pickings: Kit Kat Cookies! And a bit of OCD...

Once again it's close to ninety degrees, and I'm loving baking in my kitchen with no air conditioning or central air.  I have my mocktail by my side, sipping on a Pelligrino and mixer concoction out of an antique glass.  That cools me down just enough to embark upon making these yum-o-licious Kit Kat Cookies.  They are extra yummy.  And the recipe is easy to follow.

I was reading a book on OCD at the same time the cookies were baking (I know, taking multi-tasking to the extreme).  I started to think about my own kitchen obsessive behaviors.  I do have my routines in the kitchen, that's for sure...

-The Starbucks apron is always on

-Pandora is always playing on the Lorde station, full of Lana del Ray and Florence & the Machine

-I have an order to the way I move about the kitchen with the cookie sheets.  I know this sounds crazy, but it's like a dance routine.  And I'm pretty good at it.  (Well, aren't we bragging, MausiGal?)

-I tap things twice to get rid of excess flour or dough

There's other little things I do, but we'll stop here.  They involve dishtowels, water in the sink, and dish detergent.  I told you, my routines are pretty solid.

The other thing I do is I will only eat one cookie from the first batch I make.  Otherwise, with all the baking I do, I would be HUGE!  Like the lovelies I made today?  I won't eat them.  My sons will take over and nom nom nom on these Kit Kat cookies.

So, onto this recipe, because you definitely need to try it.  It's perfect, except for one thing.  It's SO GOOD that you need to double it.  Your circle of people will be crying out for more cookies, more cookies, more cookies, if you only make the amount specified in the recipe listed.  I doubled the batch, and made thirty-two cookies.  This was rolling them into two-inch balls before baking.  I also used chocolate chips, but I've also used white chocolate chips in this recipe before.  Both ways are just great.  Heck, through in half white chocolate and half semi-sweet chocolate chips for variety.  Go crazy!  Kit Kat Cookies are just too good to pass up!

Pinterest Pickings - Marshmallow Stuffed Cookies! NOM NOM

Ah, Vermont.  We had a great time, and made a great little snack that was composed of ice cream cones stuffed with mini-marshmallows and chocolate chips, wrapped in tinfoil, placed on the grill.  Yum!  S'more Ice Cream Cones!  Yes, of course I overbought and now I have bags of mini-mallows every where.  What to do?  I turned to Pinterest, and found this little gem of a recipe.  Nom nom nom.  These cookies are delish!

First things first, here's the link to Marshmallow Stuffed Cookies.  The food porn pics of the cookies alone will make you hungry and running to the kitchen for your mixer.  These cookies involve little mini-mallows, rolling cookie dough - a perfect activity for little kids.  KIDS WILL LOVE THIS!  I'm shouting, because I'd like to get the attention of my SisInLaw, so she mimics the recipe in her kitchen and gives me feedback.  Or she can loan me her own twin kidlets one day so we can make them here.  And make my kitchen a mess.  Love it!  Love those twin kidlets oodles!

First, note, the mini-marshmallows have to be frozen.  Alert!  Alert!  So if right now you're like, "Hey, I'm gonna eat me some cookies pronto!" you're in trouble.  Go grab about sixty mini-marshmallows (I'd say you're safe with half a bag) and throw it in the freezer. They freeze pretty quick.

What should you do while you're waiting?  You could read back entries on my blog, like when I talked about shoes, or road a vintage Harley.  Yeah.  Memories.  Or you could just go crazy and post links in my comments section with fancy shoes for me to look at, because I've only bought one pair in three months (wow - record!).  You could also get out toothpicks and build little forts with the rest of the bag of the mini-mallows.  Gosh, I never did that as a kid.  I should do that myself.  Just don't let them sit around, because then the ants will come.  And we all know how ants ruin our fun.

OK, ok, back to the recipe.  Did you find something to do while the mallows freeze?  Is it hot where you are, so did you stick your head in the freezer for awhile, or get yourself a cold beverage?  Good, good.

This recipe rocked.  I just found I didn't need as many mini-marshmallows as listed.  No biggie.  I also used regular size chocolate chips instead of minis (note last blog entry about being too lazy to go out to Stop n' Shop.  Plus I buy chocolate chips in bulk, and currently have about five pounds).

The dough became sticky, but was definitely workable.  Just make sure to not dump the flour mixture all in at once.  Then you'll have a mess that probably won't resolve itself.  Definitely add the flour mixture slowly to the wet mixture.  Then all will be well.

When molding the cookies I used an ice cream scoop and scooped out dough, placed three mini-marshmallows at the center, and then gently pressed them in.  From there I rolled the dough in a ball to make sure they were completely covered and in the center.  Don't press the cookies down when you add the chocolate chips on top; they'll even out naturally.

Yummy bliss.

Pinterest Pickings - Oreo Chip Cookies

I've decided to add a new side to my blog - critiques of recipes I try on Pinterest.  Why?  Because Pinterest is just so darn big, I know I have a problem finding recipes there that I know will work.  I've had a few be downright failures, and then I see the simplest of cookies, only to open up the ingredients only to find directions that direct me to the path of the Woolly Mammoth in Katmandu for milk.  No.  I want something simple that I can either make at 5:30 in the morning when I've got the extreme hankerin' to bake, or a quick dinner at night when I'm shuffling kidlets to and from activities.  So, here goes.

Oh yes, let's not forget my lame attempt at food porn, as seen above.  This photo is of what I made at 6:30 am today - White Chocolate Oreo Cookies.  And they turned out super yummy.

I was walking through Stop and Shop with Kidlet B yesterday, he was amazed at the new Oreo Thins.  "Who would buy these?  I mean, who wants thin Oreos?" was his complaint.  I became fixated on the chocolate wafer cookies, and just knew I had to put them in some sort of recipe.  Ice cream cookie pie - done before, too easy.  I wanted to BAKE something with them.  So I searched Pinterest.

Now, for those of you on Pinterest, you know the minute you type in any category you'll get a thousand hits back.  Such was the case with "Oreo Cookie."  (And no, I did not buy the thin ones.  Thin Oreos?  I agree with my son.  Bring on the Double Stuffed!)  The first recipe that came up required cream cheese in the recipe.  Nope, not in my house.  I did not feel like dragging my sorry arse back out in the heat, back to Stop and Shop, for cream cheese, which I'll admit I'm not a fan of unless it's a needed ingredient.  Next!  The following recipe called for vanilla pudding.  I searched my cabinets, as I usually have some on hand.  I make a great cookie bar with vanilla pudding, but alas - none!  Search, search, search I did until I came upon this great recipe from The Recipe Critic.  Butter - check.  Sugars white and brown - check.  Oreos - check.  White chocolate chips - check.  I was ready to try this out.

The simplicity of the recipe is what I liked best, and the results were fan-yumsterable-tastic.  The only thing I did differently is used half the amount of white chocolate chips (again, I wasn't about to drag my lazy self back to the supermarket for more).  They still came out fantastic!

Crushing the Oreos was very therapeutic.  How do you crush Oreos, you may ask?  Ah, it's a joy, especially early in the morning.  I took out my cutting board, and laid down two pieces of wax paper.  I put down two Oreo cookies atop one another in between the wax paper, and then slammed them with a meat tenderizer.  Oh yeah!  I must remember to use this method again once the school year starts and I feel stress building.  The pieces were just the right size.  Perfect!

My oven baked them at nine minutes (my oven runs true to temperature), but always test your own, and make sure they don't overcook.  They are so chewy and delish.  Put vanilla ice cream between two to make the perfect ice cream sandwich!

Enjoy!